


Of Love and Death

by Stelo_de_Poezio



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Ben Solo is cursed, Darth Vader was not evil, Desecrated tombs, F/M, Lord Ben Solo has a secret, Pinning and more pinning, Romance, Sloooow burn, Solo-Organa family tragedy, recurring nightmare
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2019-10-27 10:02:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17764685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stelo_de_Poezio/pseuds/Stelo_de_Poezio
Summary: A storm brings Lord Ben Solo back into his hometown, his arrival unleashing all kind of events and altering the lives of many individuals. His demeanor of mystery and gallantry making him a character that can't be kept under the radar. A family tragedy still under wraps and an unimaginable secret that connects three generations.





	1. Return

**Author's Note:**

> Hi and Welcome to my first attempt at writing anything, I chose fan fiction because I love these two characters (Ben/Rey) and I feel comfortable giving them life. This is my own version of a novel I read as a child and I've always been fascinated by, it's somehow obscure, nonetheless exquisite.  
> Be warned English is my second language and I'll be happy to adjust, correct or answer anything that may seem dubious due to semantics. I'll be extremely please if a single soul reads this.

OF LOVE AND DEAD   
CHAPTER ONE

 

Some days she would spend hours looking at the picture on the hall; the portrait of a family that once inhabited the very house she spent most of her childhood in. She was used to their presence and sometimes she even had the feeling they were observing her with their very eyes, not judging, just looking out. They must have been a happy family before all the tragedy hit their doorstep. The mother had imperative eyes, just like those of a powerful queen and the father had kind warm irises, but the boy was an entirely different being, for he had deep mysterious eyes, the depiction of a dark ocean that one could easily drown in. How did he look like at this point in time? The picture was too old to determine his evolution, how did the years treat him after his parents have died? he was still a child when he became an orphan, sort of like her. She could understand what the pain of losing a parent at a tender age did to one’s soul, had he become bitter? quiet? perhaps scared and distrustful? Hard on the outside but soft and needy within. Whatever it was, she did not have great expectations of figuring out. It was possible that one day Lord Ben Solo would become a ghost just like his parents, in the meantime, he remained far, traveling the world, studying various subjects, and there were rumors spread through town, they said he was a ladies’ man, a heartbreaker and an insufferable bachelor. He probably had so many experiences to acquire yet that he would never set foot in this little forgotten village, he’d never shown any interest to claim his family home. He had all the money and education he could wish for and she imagined he also got the looks for such a preceding reputation. This thought gave her a flush of sorts, it was weird, her curiosity getting the better of her, who cared if he was handsome or not, or if he could have any woman his heart desired, he was not here and there was no point to cavil over it.  
Although, it was public knowledge that he stayed long periods in Paris and Vienna and other splendid cities throughout Europe, mingling with far better bachelorettes, no need to come here, where there were only but a few eligible women, although, most would throw themselves at him... or at anything that breathed for that matter. She rolled her eyes imagining all those ladies caking their faces like circus performers to make an impression on him, but she knew better, that none of them would ever bother to know his heart, what lingered beneath his core, fortune and his name, just him, the man, not the means to an end.

She was so entranced in this other dimension where she often got carried away to, when she heard the pounding at the door, maybe her father was back from town and she was so behind on her chores, oh dear, it was pouring out there, she hadn’t heard any carriages or horses, just the thunderstorm, but someone was out front and probably wet to their bones, so she hurried downstairs and opened the door without a second thought, it was a dusky afternoon and the huge clock in the living room had just marked 5 p.m. several minutes before.  
A tall, broad figure was standing by the door frame, dressed in black from head to toe, his cloak was soaking and she noticed his leather gloves as he removed the hood, just in time for a lightning to illuminate his face and the sky above, his dark eyes were profound and intense, he was all too much for her eyes to bear.  
She startled, screaming and dropping the vase she hadn’t realize she was still carrying when she hopped downstairs to attend the door, but there was no mistake, it was him, the boy… the man… the portrait.

-That was my mother’s vase. He said looking at her with no visible emotion, with a  
deep voice that brought a chill up her spine.  
-My Lord, I’m sorry. She responded bowing as she was supposed to.  
-Can we skip the courtesies? I would like to enter before I catch a pneumonia.  
-Yes, of course, she hesitated moving to the side for him to pass through, and then, quickly starting to pick up the broken pieces of the vase. Can I help you with any luggage? She asked while gathering the shattered left overs on her apron.  
-My companion will get them, thank you, it is not a woman’s job to carry heavy and we don’t want more people getting under the rain than necessary.  
She nodded her head but didn’t dare to meet his eyes.  
-Lord Ben, is that you?  
An old servant squealed from the corner of the huge living room.  
-Hello, Maz. The beginnings of a smile formed on his face, as the tiny figure threw herself at him with open arms. He did not look thrilled to be embraced, nevertheless, he let it happen, the woman was so affable that he couldn’t refuse her, although it seemed she was hugging his belly button given their height difference and Rey thought of her earlier estimates about women rendering to his charms. Oh boy, he was bringing a storm with him, in more than one way however.  
-My Lord why didn’t we get a notice of your coming?  
Maz asked still smiling and looking up.  
-I… don’t call me Lord, you washed my face and told me stories when I was a child.  
She looked at him as if he was still a child.

-My Lord, I got most of the luggage, but will need to return. A trembling voice interrupted by the door. The voice came from a little man, quite younger than Ben, but pretty strong for he was hauling at least six large suitcases including a wooden trinket, it seemed like he’d grown extra limbs for the task.  
Someone else came running through the door, completely soaked by the heavy rain, Poe was holding a piece of mail and announcing:  
-The Lord of this house is to grant us with his presence-...his tidings came to a halt as he noticed the two men and his voice went several decibels down for the finishing part. -returning from his travels.   
-Oh, the… actually, the Lord is already here, of course, express mail, very reliable-, He muttered to himself.   
There was a stretch of silence, everyone trying to figure who was who, so, Maz did the appropriate thing to do.  
\- Lord… I mean, Ben, this is Poe, he is in charge of the stables and small errands.  
-My Lord, at your service, Poe greeted.  
And that is Rey, her father Mr, Plutt is the Butler; she helps me with some chores and cooking.  
-She bowed again, this time in silence.  
Ben gave her a glance and then proceeded to introduce his company.  
This is Mitaka, he is my "secretary of treasury" and most trusted friend, more like a family member.  
Mitaka turned red and looked at his shoes, he did not fancy getting any attention or compliment.  
Another figure showed up by the door, fat and almost out of breath and walking suspiciously like someone who had a little bit much to drink at the town’s cantina.  
What is going on here,? he asked.  
-Father, Rey said in alarm, the shame reddening her face and fear in her voice  
-The Lord has returned, she said with remark, pointing at Ben, who had a puzzled look on his face, Gods know what he was thinking.  
-Ah, Mr. Plutt, Maz spoke, you finally get to meet Lord Ben Solo.  
-He was hired by your... uncle after the...the accident, Maz explained to Ben.  
Ben’s face suffered a transition after the mention of his uncle, like an old wound that someone had rubbed salt on.  
-My Lord! it was all the old man could master to say.  
-Rey, have you offered something to his Lordship, or you’ve been just standing there, staring at him like he was a portrait.  
She felt humiliated at the scowling of her father, but knew better not to argue with him when he overdosed in cheap wine.  
-I’ll see to dinner, she said turning her heels straight to the kitchen.  
-Dinner! Maz remembered (the probably burned by now dinner) Of course,- Poe, help the Lords to get settled at the master’s bedroom and the adjacent room.  
-No master bedroom, I will occupy my old room, thanks. Ben said with resolution.  
-That room is… occupied at the moment, my Lord.  
-who’s taken my room? My uncle? He used to sleep at the old nursery next to my parent’s when he visited. Ben spoke with incredulity.  
-No, Rey has it now, your uncle relocated her upstairs when she grew too old to share a room down here with her father. She was my companion for a while, until my old bones couldn’t stand going upstairs anymore, and we reconditioned the junk room for me down here as well. Maz said in hopes Ben would not make troubles.  
Still not comfortable with the idea of his uncle just taking disposition of something so private without consulting him, he resigned. What could he expect from the man that had sent him away the moment his parents were laid to rest? He had been just a burden for the old man from day one. Never had he received a compliment a compassionate gesture or anything that indicated that Luke (as he called him; because he was not worthy of any title), had any affection for his only nephew, anymore than the obligation his blood and morals bestowed upon him.  
\- My old room is empty now, Maz clarified, bringing him back from his trance, it’s all clean and has new bedding, we change it every week and there is plenty of space available. Lord Mitaka can occupy the old nursery, were your uncle stays on the rare occasions he comes to visit. We will do the corresponding relocations tomorrow.  
He was not convinced, but accepted anyway, no point to drag the subject any further and besides, he was too tired to rearrange the rooms right this moment.

The house still looked like years ago, although, it seemed a lot smaller than he remembered, maybe the perspective of a child could not be compared to the one of full grown adult. Good thing his uncle hadn’t bothered to change things around, besides giving his room away to the… maid? He didn’t know exactly what the nervous girl with the drunk father really was. Obviously, Luke didn’t give a darn about something that wasn’t his. He was too busy hiding his butt from the world after his old academy had burned to the ground, the man never got over it, his shame and guilt only intensified as years passed and he drowned in pity and took off like a hermit to some remote island only to return when his twin and only sister died.   
The staircases and hall seemed extremely narrow, again, he’d been only a boy back then, the wallpaper was yellowed but still held in place, the house seemed well preserved but not remodeled as it should have been. To his left he found his parents’ room, a memory of his mother and father hugging tightly on their bed washed over him, they fought sometimes, but he never doubted they loved each other to death, literally. Further down on the same side and connected by a door in between was the old nursery room, where he’d spent the first three years of his life right next to his parents, in the safety of their closeness, until he got moved to the other side of the hall, to make room for the next baby his parents were planning to have, a sibling that never came to be, however, the room remained furnished with his crib and toys for years.  
Across the hall two other rooms mirrored as twins, they were also connected by a small door in between, but had independent entrances and bathrooms, all four chambers were generously sized and elegantly put together.   
He remembered he would asked Maz every night to keep the door in between open, he was plagued by a horrible nightmare since he could remember and he felt comfort knowing she was close and would come running if she heard him scream in the middle of the night which was often the case.   
He entered the room on his right and Poe and Mitaka followed right behind him, the latter unloading the stuff on the floor and signaling the other guy to drop the rest.  
That’s all his? Poe asked with wide incredulous eyes, what about yours?  
Mitaka turned showing a small bag across his chest all the way to his back.  
-You cannot transport much in that... "purse", unless you are wearing lingerie.  
The three of them chuckled, but Lord Ben quickly turned his face still again.  
The two headed for the door and made a respectful bow.  
Alone in the alcove, he unpacked most of his belongings, his books were his most beloved companions and he had plenty of them, actually, in his old room, he recalled, there should be still a large collection of volumes from his father’s travels, he had always brought new ones and read them to him. From medicine encyclopedias to novels and handwritten notebooks, he was fascinated by all the knowledge he could get his hands on. He barely left his room to play outside, and his parents never opposed to that idea seemingly understanding what his need was and didn’t mind him being around, little he knew about their motives, the real reason behind that.  
He suddenly felt the impulse to get into his old room and investigate the whereabouts of his stuff, but got stopped in his tracks by the door that was closed and probably locked from the other side. He wasn’t going to check for it was not his room any longer and any attempt to forcefully walk in there was trespassing, even if he was the rightful owner of the house and everything in it, he didn’t own people’s privacy, mostly a girl’s who had not done nothing more than obeyed the commands of his absurd uncle. She probably couldn’t even read anyway, a commoner’s daughter was likely to be illiterate and ignorant. Education was basic even for high born ladies, poor women had no chance to learn for it was limited and expensive.  
Ben took a bath and lit more candles as he opened Plato, the philosophers words were calming, a balm to his tormented soul that helped him derail his thoughts from the negativity that clouded him often like a void that threatened to eat him alive.  
At eight he got food delivered by Mitaka in his rooms, they spoke briefly, as his companion could barely keep his eyes open, so he dispatched him and then, he proceeded to change into his silky pajama pants and robe.  
He continued reading in his bed, sleep eluding him even after their sixteen hour trip.   
He had forgotten all about the inhabitant on the other side when he heard her carefully entering the adjacent alcove, he saw the light of a candle on the thin line under the door’s threshold , It was past ten, and no matter how she tiptoed around, his ears were magnificently acute, and registered every move even as he annoyingly tried to ignore it.  
She set the candle by the night stand and sighed sitting for a moment on her bed, then rumbled for a while in her bathroom that was thankfully all the way to the other side, but came back quickly and changed into her night garments, a single gown, he could tell by the noise it made when she put it on.  
She then sank in the bed, covered up and turned to one side, the left one he guessed, then made a twist all the way to the right and blew the candle out.  
He couldn’t tell when, but he was sure she was now asleep, for it was past midnight and she was breathing soothingly, the sound lulling him, he was getting tired too, so, he cupped the candle and put the book under his pillow, closing his eyes and drifting off.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

After putting her drunken father to sleep and cleaning the astronomical mess in the kitchen with Maz, Rey finally made it to her room... well, to the room were she’d slept in for the past ten years and that now she suddenly needed to return to the rightful owner, who was eager to claim it.  
She walked in trying to make the minimal noise, although she saw a light under the door. He was awake and she was intrigued as to know what exactly he could be doing on the other side, maybe plotting to make everyone scramble at his whims, yeah, he seemed that type of Lord, one who could easily be a tyrant, impulsive and arrogant. She rolled her eyes as she slipped into her nightgown, those were the thoughts of a silly girl, then, she slid into bed considering that however it turned out to be she finally had gotten the answer she couldn’t find for years, how Lord Ben looked like physically, he was...well...undeniably attractive and big and magnetic...her stomach made a funny thing when his image appeared in her head, weird, she was not hungry, she probably had gotten an indigestion or something.   
Later she realized that the candle was to the other side and she had to go all the way to blow it out. She succumbed to Morpheus almost as she lay her head on the pillow.

Hours later she was awaken by a terrifying sound, someone screaming outside her bedroom, still half asleep and disoriented she opened her eyes in confusion and total darkness.


	2. Desecrated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightly activities in a remote area of town. More character development and few surprises here and there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning. Now we are getting to the creepy part my dears.

  
  
  
  
  


 

It was dark outside, the storm rampant and growing vigorously. Two figures were running down the last concrete street, heading towards the outskirts of town. Suddenly one of them stopped; a shivering man holding a wheelbarrow. The other shape was of a woman taller than him, and she carried a shovel.   
“What the hell are you doing?” she asked turning around.    
“I refuse to do this any longer,” said the man. “I wish to return home.”   
  
She couldn’t tell if he was crying, for they were soaked from head to toes.   
“I want to go home; I want my mommy,” she replied with a mocking tone.   
“Stop whining and keep moving!”   
“No, I won’t, I’m cold and hungry,” insisted he.   
“I have no patience for this,” she warned menacingly, holding the shovel up.

“If we don’t get to deliver what we promised to Dr. Max, I will bring you so that he can dissect you instead.”    
“No, please, I am scared of dead people,” he said, begging for mercy.

“You should be scared of the living, they are the real threat.” She scowled and then started to walk decidedly; he sighed and tagged along right behind her.

 

The iron gates appeared higher that night; the storm giving them a terrifying gothic look. Two gargoyles on each side were vigilant and seemingly aware of the intruders.   
Esther pushed the right gate open. The sound of rusty metal was creaking loud, but the clap of thunder was more deafening. The cemetery was muddy, and making their way through the graveyard was onerous. The inscribed headstones remained still. Some so old that names and dates were partially faded away along with the memories of those who rested beneath; long forgotten by their once beloved whom by now had passed as well.    
They made it all the way to the back were recent burials had taken place.   
And there it was!    
“Rest in peace, John “The Butcher,” the gravestone proclaimed. Esther crossed herself, and without further ado, she started to dig into the clay-like soil.   
Her husband picked up his own shovel with far less enthusiasm and silently dug his allotment alongside her.

After what seemed like eternity, their tools finally touched the wooden surface. The casket was big, and so was John the butcher. Esther pulled the lid open with a crowbar, and there he was! Her eyes widened like a child’s in front of a candy store while her husband’s eyes were shut.    
John had been buried in the morning; his widow and nine children all present. He wore the only suit he owned; the same he used to go to church with every Sunday. They had also put his utility axe into his hands; something that was not appreciated by the couple as it made him even heavier. The rigorousness of his hands ensured the axe stayed in place.   
Esther began to tie ropes around various areas of his massive body, which should have made it less challenging to lift him. Given the present weather and his weight, however, the process was lengthy, arduous and stressful.    
Between the both of them 300 hundred pounds of dead weight made it all the way to the surface. Their faces triumphant as they placed him in the wheelbarrow. Now it was a done deal, or so they thought, until they heard a faint voice and a distant bark from a dog; it was the undertaker!   
“What are you doing here?” He asked, pointing at them with a rifle.    
Esther gave him a blow with a quick swing of her crowbar. The man was falling at the same time as his gun was shot, but it missed its target. Her husband jumped at him in an attempt to remove his weapon. It was in that heat of the moment that the gun got fired for a second time, a deafening sound at close range.   
“Olaf!” She screamed, panicked now by the possibility of her husband being hurt, but it was the sexton who had accidentally shot himself in the head.   
Olaf got to his feet and started to cry. It was evident the man was dead.    
“I didn’t do it, he did it! What are we going to do Esther?”   
Then, a brilliant idea crossed her mind.   
“There is an open tomb, and there is a corpse. What would be the last place you would search if you were looking for a person who was alive?”   
“A grave”! said Olaf, removing tears and grinning, showing all of his decaying teeth.   
She nodded.   
By the time they had completed the task of putting the undertaker 6 feet under, it was almost daylight and the rain was barely falling any longer.    
They ran through the back doors and into the forest encountering a rudimentary road. There was a carriage. A man descended from it, aiding them to transfer the dead man into a bigger vehicle for transportation.   
“What took you so long?” the stranger asked.   
“We had trouble,” she explained. ”The undertaker saw us, and we had to take care of him.”   
“It was an accident,” said Olaf with trembling voice, still in shock from their earlier encounter.   
“You killed him?”   
“He shot himself with his own gun, and we merely put him to rest,” Esther told him.   
“You’ve got to be the dumbest people I’ve ever known! One thing is an already dead person, murdering somebody is an entirely different thing!”    
“We didn’t kill him,” Olaf repeated.   
“Never mind, I want you to disappear until the whole thing is over; I don’t want business with you fools.”   
“But doctor, we need the money…”   
The man took a velvet sack out of his pocket and threw it onto them from above. It landed on the wet ground, coins spilling all over.   
“Hide away for now, and don’t ever mention our business. If they figure, you’re on your own.”   
After his last words, he hit the road and dissipated into the nightly air like smoke.   
Esther collected the coins and placed the sack near her chest; the safest place for now. Without one drop of strength left in them, they started the strenuous walk back home.    
  
................................................................................................................................

  
  


Rey opened her eyes in the dead of the night. She heard the clamor clearly now, and she knew that it was his voice. A  mingle of intelligible words and angst, a tempest from within that matched with the one outside the windows. She got on her feet and moved close to the source trying to hear whatever was going on.

 

Lord Ben was having a nightmare, and it was a scary one. She was not paying any attention to his words, only his distress as he obviously was troubled. She was so afraid to open the door. How would she explain her presence in his chambers if he woke up? Dignity and protocol dictated that she remained where she was; no matter what she heard. Thus, she stood for hours by the threshold and listened to his agony. She didn’t dare to move a muscle, praying that whatever had taken possession of him let go! It clung onto him merciless for endless times until she was drained of her energy and half out out of her wits; at some point so exhausted that she lost consciousness.

 

Next time she opened her eyes she was in her bed with no recollection of how or when she got there. The morning light shone in intensely from the oversized windows. She turned to the side and was shocked by the realization that it was almost 10 a.m. She had overslept, and the alarm hadn’t woken her at her usual seven o’clock hour.

She took the shortest shower she could remember and ran downstairs to the kitchen to find Maz in the middle of cooking and cleaning.

“Good morning, I’m so sorry. I just woke up,” she explained.

Maz was wearing the same face she always did;  a soft, serene and warm look that bore no judgment.

“That’s alright, child,” I managed, and you needed the rest. We all did after the eventful evening.”

“Is the Lord awake, too?” Rey asked.

“Yes, he is an early bird as well as a night owl as far as I remember.” “Here!” she presented Rey with a cup and a plate. “He requested some tea earlier, but I had my hands full. He is somewhere in the living room reading, I guess.”

Rey took the dish and marched off with trembling hands.

 

“Good morning, my Lord, I brought you some tea,” she said without lifting her head.

He was sitting on a broad cushion chair, and he had a book in his hands. She wondered how someone his size went about life, clearly with difficulty as he couldn’t just fit everywhere like the rest.

“Place it on the table,” he ordered without giving her as much as a glance.

She did and was on her way out when he asked in a low voice:

“Slept well?” 

Rey couldn’t think of anything coherent to reply when she heard the door and saw Poe poking his head in; she felt relieved until he spoke.

“Hi sweetheart,” Maz said, “I should help you with your moving downstairs, although, you know there is plenty of room at my place and you’re welcome to share it.” He winked and smiled. 

“Poe, please,” Rey said trying to give the man a clue and a “I will murder you later” type of look.

He gravely realized that Ben was there too, just an icy stare within his stoic face, and his dark outfit. Placing the book on the armrest of the chair, he stood.

“Mr. Dameron, I would appreciate if everyone around this household treated others with their due respect, using given names to address one another; you know, to keep it professional.”

“I’m sorry, my Lord, that will not happen again,” Poe said with remorse.

Rey couldn’t breathe or move. The awkwardness was too much for her nerves.

Ben spoke again:

“Asking to help Rey with the move, that won’t be necessary. My assistant is already handling that task as this is just a mere switch of places. I will occupy my old room, and she will move right next door. 

Poe couldn’t look more disappointed.

“There is no need for us to delay your day to day activities,” Ben remarked.

“Yes sir,” Poe said on his way out, “I shall see you later, Rey.”

“Mr. Dameron, just one more thing,” Ben approached him while speaking.

“For future reference, a decent man would not ask of a lady he estimates to “share” his dwelling, unless such proposal comes with a ring. You know it’s the appropriate thing to do.”

“Yes, my Lord, I wonder however,”  he said with a hint of malice, “if it is really an appropriate thing for a solitary lady to sleep in the alcove right across to her master.”

Ben’s eyes shot daggers at Poe as he had a defiance look, but he chose not to say anything else.

“Forgive him Lord Ben,” he is young and impulsive, but I assure you he doesn’t mean any harm, for he is a good guy,” Rey assured him while Poe disappeared behind the door.

  
  


The move was as easy as it could be. Rey’s belongings were merely a few boxes, and Ben’s suitcases were mostly still unpacked from the trip.

“This is the last item, my Lord,” Mitaka informed Ben at the same time he was placing the wooden trunk on the floor, and Rey observed that it had a locket on it.

She went about her business making his bed and trying to be as invisible as possible in his presence.

Ben was devouring some encyclopedia of sorts, and Mitaka was in awe as he tried to scan through the large collection of books that covered the walls. One in particular caught his attention.

“My Lord,” he said with excitement, “look at this book, “The Forbidden Poems of “Sor Juana Ines de La Cruz.” 

Rey turned her attention to the man. She was fearful but determined when declaring:

“That book belongs to me.”

“Who is Sor Juana, or whatever you said. I never heard of her?” Ben asked Mitaka, without taking her words into consideration.

“She is some Spanish nun, a revolutionary. Her books were banned, and only a handful were translated and passed around.” Mitaka answered his request, looking at Rey, for her distress was now evident.

“She was Mexican,” Rey corrected and lowered her gaze. 

“Anything interesting?” asked Ben.

Mitaka opened the book at random and read one of the poems

 

“ _-Scorn and favor, favor, scorn,_ __   
What you will, result the same,   
Treat you ill, and earn your blame,   
Love you well, be left forlorn.”

 

Ben narrowed his eyes and with lots of interest turned his face to Rey who to his amazement and surprise recited the next paragraph.

 

__ “-What must be the rare caprice   
Of the quarry you engage:   
If she flees, she wakes your rage,   
If she yields, her charms surcease.”

 

There was something about the way Rey declaimed the poem as if her whole being was engaged into it; as if words had traveled through her veins and emerged from her pores. Her hazel eyes were clear and shiny, as if she was casting a spell.

 

Ben swallowed, and Mitaka was speechless.

 

“Your uncle read it to me many times,” she clarified. “I just know the words, my Lord.”

Ben was uncertain, yet he took the book from his assistant; he placed it into her hands.

This unexpectedly gesture startled both of them. The book in between served as an energy conductor. They felt as if some sparks erupted and drew back from each other faster than the speed of light. Rey hasted to the door leaving him behind with a discomposed blend of feelings.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your kudos, I wish to hear some thoughts about the story and I promise that I will write this until the end regardless of one or one hundred people reading it.  
> Thank you to my Beta and friend Alexandra for embellishing this fanfic and to my cats and dogs (I pet sit) for their continuous support and companionship.  
> Love, K


	3. VISITORS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People are curious about the new comers, Ben Solo is getting popular... mostly with the ladies!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will add a few chapters, they are not that long.

It was late in the afternoon when they heard the door being knocked insistently. Maz came to answer, as Rey was busy bringing dinner to her father. Two women were standing outside. “Good afternoon, my ladies. How can I help you?” Maz said trying to ignore the obvious disdain on one of the women’s faces; the older one. Her younger companion was alert and smiling with curiosity, her eyes playfully searching the surroundings. “We came to see Lord Ben Solo as we just figured he’s returned,” the older woman explained, looking down at the old maid. “I regret to inform you that his lordship stepped out, he went earlier for a horse-ride,” Maz said with an apologetic voice. “That’s alright,” said the woman, pushing herself through the door and tagging her daughter along. “We shall wait for him.” “Of course, come in,” said Maz gentle yet with a hint of sarcasm in her tone. “Would you like a cup of tea? The wait may be long.” “Yes,” the woman said strolling around while inspecting the house. “I always wanted to come here as a child. This house was intriguing back in the day,” said the younger lady. “You know with all those stories you’ve heard of tragedies and ghosts; everyone thought it was haunted.” “Well, it is a beautiful house indeed, in dire need of remodeling, but stunningly well crafted nonetheless; a piece of art on its own,” concluded the mother. With a quick bow Maz retrieved to the kitchen where she found Rey washing a pile of dishes. “We got visitors,” Maz said with a face of displeasure. “Who?” Rey frowned, drying her hands on her apron. “Some fancy ladies from town.” “You don’t like them?” Rey asked. “No, I don’t like that pair,” she emphasized while pointing to the door. Rey curiously spied through the little window-glass. “They look fine, just a little overdressed for the countryside,” she said with a smile looking back at Maz. “As if I wouldn’t know what intentions brought them here. That old cockatoo has killed three husbands, she is loaded, but she still isn’t happy, no…” Rey was amused at how Maz seemed to be transformed into a completely different person, far from her peaceful usual self. “She is hunting for a husband, you’ll see, she forebode while pouring water into the cups. “For herself? I mean, Lord Ben is a little too young…” “No my dear, for her daughter…” Maz replied setting her hands on her apron. Rey couldn’t help it, her face got a look of interest. “She will kill him, just like her venomous mother used to do,” Maz ascertained. “Oh?” was all Rey could utter. “Yes, she wears way too much perfume, he will die from poisoning.” Rey winced at that, not knowing if Maz was joking or not. “I think I will suggest Lord Ben Solo to have some of these pieces restore,” said the older woman, pointing at some lounge chairs and benches. “There are so many books in here, mother, I’m feeling as if I was at the library,” pointed her daughter out. “Ah, those, scribble papers, nothing worth or special about them, just dust collectors; a waste of space only meant to keep one’s maid occupied,” said the mother with dismay, as Rey walked in holding the tray. “Good afternoon, my ladies,” she said, placing the tea nearby. She could sense that one of them was truly uneasy and displeased by her presence as the women turned and gave her a quick but thorough inspection. “And who might be you?” asked the mother. “My name is Rey,” she answer, and she wished a big hole opened under her feet. The woman scrutinized her like an insect, not even a bit concerned to cover up her hateful regard.” “Your mother and father are they servers of Lord Ben as well?” The woman inquired further. “My father also works for Lord Ben Solo; my mother is dead, my lady.” She answer with sad eyes and low voice. The woman didn’t question any more, and Rey had the impression she already knew that. Her daughter, however, looked at her with some compassion. All heads pointed towards the door as it opened and Lord Ben along with Mitaka appeared. The two visitors leapt to their feet instantly, all smiles and curtesy. “Oh Lord Ben Solo we heard so much about you that we decided to pay you a visit and welcome you into our little town,” the older woman said without taking a pause to breath. “My lady you shouldn’t have inconvenient yourself with such a long journey. I’m rather a simple man with not much to surprise,” said he, so obviously uncomfortable with the sudden unannounced visitors. “I’m Bernadette Astor,” said the woman extending her hand for him to kiss. “And this is my daughter, Barbara.” He kissed both hands, and the women seemed enchanted by the gesture; the latter lingering past the decency time for staring at a stranger. “Please take a sit my ladies, have you been offered something?” Ben asked as curtsey demanded. “Rey,” he added eyes turning to her. She was just standing there in the middle of the room, like a lonely pensive island in the ocean. “Bring the ladies and us something to drink.” “I’ll have some tea,” said Mitaka with a friendly smile. “Yes, my Lord.” When she returned, Bernadette was talking non stop about Paris and the latest fashion and how he should consider remodeling the house and leaving that task to her. “I mean, my Lord, this house could easily become one of the most upscale mansions in this town. No matter how isolated, people would be knocking your doors trying to catch a peek,” Bernadette remarked excitedly. “I don’t know if I would like to draw that kind of attention, Mrs. Astor...I’d rather have my privacy…” “Oh, my Lord, please call me Bernadette, we are friends now,” she said. “As I was telling you, Bernadette, I don’t want prying eyes on me; I am a man who appreciates the quiet and tranquil life.” “Oh, Ben Solo,” she dared to call him by his name as well, ”You can’t always isolate yourself here, like that weird uncle of yours…you don’t want to remain a bachelor and die alone, do you?” “Mother!” said Barbara with warning voice, “I think we should change subjects, you’re making Lord Ben uncomfortable.” “Forgive her, my Lord, for she gets excited around new faces,” Barbara pointed out with an apologetic expression; maybe a little ashamed of her mother’s imprudence. Ben was not speaking, just analyzing the situation. Although mother and daughter were physically alike, their characters differed by miles. All in all Bernadette was probably right, he would end up just dying alone like his horrible uncle, the man he hated with all his guts. Good thing was at least he wouldn’t have to wait that long… “My Lord,” he was brought back from his thoughts, “would you like some tea?” Rey asked him. “No, I think I’ll get something a bit stronger, how about some rum? My father had a few bottles all the way over there,“ he pointed at some vintage cabinet. “Are you sure,” enquired Mitaka, “that alcohol is a good idea, I mean…” “Yes, it is a great idea,” he answered fully convinced. Tension was growing in the room, and Rey searched swiftly through the cabinets, grabbed the first bottle and brought it over. “I was also telling my daughter,” continue Bernadette, “it would be a great idea to restore some of the fine art pieces, and maybe make some space for a few more additions…” Again, she didn’t take a pause while talking. “How would that be, my Lady, can you elaborate further?” Ben enquired with fake interest, but far more relaxed mannered thanks to the alcohol. “You could…”she carefully chose her words. “You know, redistribute your books to another area…” To that Ben almost jumped out of his chair. “Books are knowledge, Bernadette, they are more worth than gold, art and money together.” Rey smiled with a sort of pride. “Of course, Ben, I just meant… never mind, my daughter and I were admiring your collection earlier on.” At this, Barbara rolled her eyes. Her mother and her big mouth; one of those days she was gonna bring them in trouble. “Really?” asked Ben. “How about we read a little. My parents and I used to read every afternoon. “Just like Barbara and myself, said the woman lying through gritted teeth. “Of course,” Ben lied back and without further ado he ordered Rey, who was now serving Mitaka his second cup. “Rey, would you hand me Plato…” he said pointing out. She went all the way to the upper stand and extended her hand just to retrieve it rapidly, knowing what he just had tried to do. She almost felt for his trap. “Which color, my Lord?” she asked timidly. “Red,” said he with a knowing smile. She sought out the book and while doing so, a piece of paper floated across the room. It was a handwritten note, it fell to Barbara’s feet. “What is this?” she asked with curiosity. “Probably my uncle’s hidden “treasures.” He used to write random poems and place them between the books. It doesn’t look like a poem, rather a note or a letter. “My Love,” she read. “This isn’t goodbye for I will return and we will elope together; I promise, nothing will come between us.” Bernadette got closer to inspect the note and her face nearly turned white, some recognition written all over her face. She forced her daughter up and ripping the paper from her hands placed it on the nearest surface. “We must be on our way,” she said nervously. The abrupt news taking everyone by surprise including Barbara. “But mother, we just…” “Barbara, it is getting dark and late have you no conscience of the dangers that can await two women and an older servant at late hours on a lonely road?” Barbara frowned but didn’t protest. Her mother scolded her some more. “They haven’t found those body snatchers yet, and the undertaker is still missing.” “Mother, they are desecrating graves, not killing people at random,” her daughter said mockingly. “What makes you think they would not just kill someone in order to get “fresh flesh”...” “What are you ladies talking about?” Ben interrupted. “There seems to be a couple of individuals who have stolen a half dozen of corpses out of the cemetery for unknown purposes. My guess is black magic and evil-related crafts,” assured the mother. “How do you know it is more than one individual,” Mitaka enquired, intrigued by the whole thing. “It would rather be hard for a lonely perpetrator to act on his own.There needs to be at least two people doing that, maybe working for a shady individual who wants those corpses but wouldn’t get his hands dirty on the task,” concluded Ben. “It’s not black magic...I mean, their ultimate motive,” said Mitaka… ”I think it is for medical research.” The women looked at one another and crossed themselves. They hurried back to their carriage leaving in their wake an atmosphere of wonder and uncertainty behind. “My Lord,” Maz called from the kitchen door, “would you care for some dinner?” “No,” said Ben, “I suddenly lost my appetite,” and he vanished upstairs. It was past midnight again when Rey finally made her way to the room. Her father’s state of health was declining progressively in what seemed to be the sum of all ailments. She was exhausted beyond her humanity, after all the chores added by the presence of two more people in the house. Minus her father’s collaboration, and Maz own limitations the to-do list seemed to elongate by the hour. It weighed heavily on her shoulders, but she felt no rights to protest. It was not within her nature to complain or to feel sorry for herself. The light of her old room was off, but she had the sneaky feeling that his lordship was awake on the other side; just staring at some point, for he sometimes lived in his own world. She did her nightly routine and with a long sigh finally climbed onto the glorious bed. As she sprawled herself under the covers she imagined him in the darkened, adjoined room; lying in his silky black pajamas that she had washed with her own hands, running her fingers through the long pants in appreciation of the smooth texture. She shivered at that thought and sat up. Her mind was clearly overactive, tired or not! She thought it was a bad idea to let her imagination continuously think of the wrong ideas, but she couldn’t help it, unless… She reached under her pillow for the only escape she knew. After a few attempts at reading, Ben gave up and just layed there for the sake of it; it was late, his old room didn’t feel familiar anymore and he felt like a stranger in his own place, he couldn’t forget Rey’s sad eyes as she gathered her meager belongings and obediently fled to another location. He was no less than a desecrator, no different than those taking corpses. Except he was taking something far more meaningful that belonged to a breathing human. The only moment she slightly protested being when her ownership of that strange book was questioned. She’d been fierce, and Ben thought for a moment that under that mask of a defenseless deer was a hidden lioness. He smiled at that as his eyes astrayed and fixed themselves on his wooden trunk. It was calling to him, but he refused to be seduced to open it; not tonight anyway… What was taking her so long, he wondered, and why the hell where the pillows not exchanged. Now her smell lingered around his bed. He heard the door, the way she was dragging her feet, how she sighed in exhaustion and did a quick fix just to promptly retreat to bed. She didn’t blow the candles, however, she also didn’t move. Was she having drifting thoughts as well? He heard how she subtly moved, obviously trying not to alert him, but nothing could escape Ben Solo’s hearing. His ears registered the unmistakable sound of a paper being rustled. He smiled knowingly. “Oh, you are clever my sweet girl, but so am I…” he muttered to himself. “Your secret is safe with me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my beta and friend, to the kitty on my lap, definitely inspiring. XD


	4. Thieves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mr. Solo is hiring, do you wanna enquire?

It was exactly after two months of his arrival that Ben Solo started to feel adapting to his new life circumstances. He spent his days going through papers and checking finances as well as giving orders to Poe and Mr. Plutt to do repairs; only minor cosmetic details as he wasn’t ready yet to bring in a crew of intruders to take care of the big elements. For now, he just wanted the basic covered. Most afternoons (when the weather allowed it) he went on horseback. Sometimes with his faithful companion and sometimes by himself to reflect and enjoy moments of solitude. He also immersed himself in his endless collections of books and debated with Mitaka about philosophy and other random topics which spontaneously crossed his mind. They took delight in having some tea. Its flavor distinguished like glory; one only Maz could bring into existence. She never told anyone what she put in there, and he was sure she would probably take that amongst other secrets to her grave.  
Rey always served the beverage and lingered around during those heated discussions polishing over the same surfaces in an attempt to remind as long as possible. He knew better; she enjoyed the conversations and had an opinion of her own, although, she was too respectful to speak her mind.  
From time to time, Lord Ben and Mitaka also ventured into town. By now they have gotten used to the stares of people who seemed never too busy to gossip over the “newcomers.”There was no point to try and come and go inadvertently, even though they mostly kept interactions to a minimum; they heard the whispers behind their backs.  
Today was one of those days. Both lords were striding down the market, which was quite busy for a week day, when they heard a revolt and a fight. People pushed them forwards as they carelessly tried to pass by to see what was happening a few steps away.  
What was it about most people that they were so eager to figure out other’s business’ like it was their own? Ben would never understand such behavior.  
“It looks like someone else is giving a show today,” Ben said rolling of eyes. Now they were being pushed forward and stepped on more times they could count; struggling to get out of the crowd with no avail. The horde had no boundaries for one’s personal space, and that was particularly annoying for Ben Solo. He despised being touched. Nothing terrified him more than someone laying his hands on him. Even in those more intimate moments he had always avoided direct contact beyond the necessity. Cuddling was out of the question, and he couldn’t remember when was the last time he reciprocated a hug.  
Because height was to his advantage, he could see the scenario at display.  
A woman and a man (probably her husband) were fighting with a merchant.  
“Constable, help me!” Screamed the man, while the couple begged his mercy.  
“I will have you both hang for stealing,” the merchant told them with menacing voice.  
“No, please don’t,” the couple pleaded.  
Exasperated, Ben finally inquired. Maybe if he intervened he could get the hell out of there before he died of suffocation. “What’s the problem,” he asked loudly.  
Everyone turned to him, for his presence was imposing and relevant.  
“These two crooks, my Lord, stole from me,” protested the man.  
“What did they take?”  
“A loaf of bread,” he replied.  
“We were hungry,” said one of the thieves; he was crying.  
“All this scandal for a piece of bread? Unbelievable,” he thought.  
“A loaf,” corrected the man.  
“A steal one, not even good quality. I can bake better,” allegated the woman.  
Ben went through his pocket and threw the man a couple of coins which he caught with little effort.  
“Will that cover the debt?”  
The man silently nodded with greedy eyes, forgetting the incident as if it never happened. The crowd scattered quickly, and Ben got his much needed oxygen back.  
The couple came running towards him.  
“Thank you, my lord,” the woman kissed his hands, and the man kneeled at his feet.  
Ben was now more uncomfortable than before.  
“It was nothing,” he said. “Now be on your way, we have plenty of things to do.”  
“My Lord, if we could help you with anything to pay off the debt” the woman uttered.  
“There is no need for that,” said Ben turning his back to the couple.  
“Although…,” he twisted around once more.  
“We were thinking about hiring a couple of people to help around the house…”  
“You cannot be serious,” mumbled Mitaka in a low voice only meant for Ben’s ears.  
Ben looked analytically at the subjects. They felt a little intimidated by his glare, but didn’t back an inch. At least the woman didn’t; she seemed brave enough and that impressed the lord of the top hill mansion. For there came others that were all too scared even to set foot back into the house after the first interview.  
“Can you cook?” He asked her.  
“And bake,” she responded happily; her cheeks round and blushed.  
“She makes the best cakes, my lord; you’re going to lick your fingers,” added the man.  
“Cake?” Replied Ben with a hint of interest. “Like a birthday cake?”  
“Yes,” said her, now excited about the prospect. “Is it your birthday, my Lord? I can bake you a chocolate cake.” She twisted her feet and had stars in her eyes like a child.  
Ben couldn’t help but smile back. “In two weeks. Maybe we can pick up those ingredients today, so you can work on your masterpiece?”  
“I wasn’t really going to celebrate, but maybe we can have some cake.”  
She nodded in agreement.   
“Excuse us a moment,” said Mitaka pulling Ben from his arm a little bit away from the couple.  
“My lord, do you think hiring a couple of thieves from the marketplace is a good idea? I don’t trust them at all. They look like a couple of weasels,” he pointed and turned to face them.  
And there they were, smiling brightly, just like a couple of weasels.  
“We agreed that we needed to bring in more help. Maz and Mr. Plutt are too old, and Rey can’t barely keep up with the chores all by herself. That poor girl has no time to rest, she probably sleeps five hours or less,” said Ben, realizing a bit too late that he was giving out unnecessary information.  
“How do you…” Mitaka was about to asked, but was interrupted by Ben.  
“You know how much we’ve tried to hire people for the last several weeks. They all refused, even after we offered double the pay. It’s not as if we have so many choices, and my guts tell me that they will prove themselves useful and loyal in the long run.”  
“But they’re filthy, my lord, said Mitaka exasperated.  
“Nothing a little soap and water can’t resolve.”  
He walked towards them and announced:  
“You are hired.”  
“I’m Esther,” the woman said and offered her hand after she wiped it on her dress. “This idiot is my husband Olaf. He simply smiled.  
“I’m Ben Solo…”  
“We know,” the couple said in unison.  
“I have a bad feeling about his,” Mitaka muttered to himself.

Walking to the carriage was a difficult business. It seemed as if they’d bought the entire marketplace and beyond.  
As they’d finished to load all the stuff, they couldn’t help but notice three women running and waving at them. On closer inspection they recognized Bernadette, Barbara and another figure they hadn’t seen before.  
“Yoohoo, Ben Solo! Oh, it is so nice to see you again,” said Bernadette enthusiastically.  
“Always a pleasure, my lady,” he answered politely, and he then turned to greet Barbara and her companion who walked arm in arm with her.  
“Hi, this is Eugene my best friend.”   
“It’s an honor to meet you, my lord. I’ve heard so much about you,” she said offering her hand and squeezing his in turn. He evaluated her, as he unconsciously did everyone he met. Eugene was highly attractive, and she was well aware of that fact. He could tell right away that she liked playing with men’s weaknesses, for the top part of her bodice was way lower than anyone would dare to wear in such traditional town. He’d been to Paris, however, and he’s seen worst, so he kept his eyes on her face; not falling for the cleavage trick and keeping a serious manner.  
She smiled flirtatiously at him, and also at Mitaka who was a little astounded. She even extended her coquettish look at Olaf who was blatantly staring at her breasts. Esther noticed that and put an elbow into his stomach gesturing him to close his mouth.  
“My ladies, you have to excuse us now, as we need to retrieve before the weather changes,” Ben told them.  
“My lord, if I didn’t know any better, I would say you’re evading us and our invitation to come over to our house,” Bernadette retorted.  
“I have been quite busy since my arrival. You saw the state of the house; it is just a lot to keep up with when no one has been there to care for the property for decades,” Ben replied calmly, even though he candidly wanted to turn and run.  
“At least promise me that you are going to invite us over when the house is reinstated…” Bernadette didn’t bargain when it came to do as she wished. She knew Ben wouldn’t promise in vain. He was a man of integrity. His word meant a lot to him, so she pushed forward. “Perhaps you could make a small celebration to let everyone know that you’re back. It would be a splendid opportunity to mingle with important people of this town.”  
“I…,” Ben started to talk, but he was interrupted by Olaf.  
“You should come for his birthday; we are having cake…,” said Olaf wide grin.  
There was no turning back from that.  
Esther’s eyes opened like plates. She stepped on her husband’s foot forcefully, but it was too late.  
“Birthday?” The women were hysterical, all talking at once and making plans as Ben’s head was spinning. He wondered how did he get into this? Drawing attention was the most aberrant thing he could go through; maybe that merchant should have hang Olaf.  
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Ben tried to argue, but they were merciless. There was going to be a party at all costs. They’d sworn it would be under discretion, but he knew better. There was no such a thing as decorum.  
“Wonderful,” said Bernadette, “we will help you with the preparations. “My second husband loved parties. I helped him organize so many, you won’t need to worry about a thing!” The girls giggled, and with a last handshake, they all walked away chatting in excitement.  
He sighed in resignation; the nightmare was real.

They arrived on time for the storm to begin. Maz was at the door when their carriage took a halt. She looked intrigued at the couple, greeting as the lords approached.  
“Good afternoon, right timing, my lords. I was afraid the weather was going to trouble you”.   
“Don’t worry there, Maz, for Mr. Plutt is an excellent chauffeur. Not a talkative one, but nonetheless he does his job well”, said Mitaka who arrived first at the door and knew the man in question couldn’t hear him.  
“And those two?” Maz asked him with a frown.  
“New workers,” replied Mitaka screwing his face into a grimace.  
“Is the lord in the habit of bringing beggars home? He brought hurt animals as a child, but this is a whole new level of…”  
“Maz,” called Ben, “I brought you and Rey help, please supply our new employees with blankets and towels and whatever clothes you can find. They will be staying at the cabin and they are hungry.”  
Maz couldn’t help it; she was seriously considering that Ben has lost his marbles. Rey came towards the door at this point. She looked with curiosity at the two individuals.  
“These are Esther and Olaf; they will be helping around from tomorrow on,” Ben said in hopes at least one person would be happy about it and without doubting his mental state.  
She smiled faintly and said “hi” to them.  
“My lord, I can bring toiletries and food right here; no need for them to set foot in the house.”  
“Why not?” Asked Esther  
“We almost have no lice,” assured Olaf scratching his head.  
Maz was at the verge of a heart attack, while Rey snorted and laughed obviously amused by the entire scenario.  
Ben caught that. A rare moment of joy which she seldomly allowed herself to have. She smiled beautifully: Straight, white teeth, hazel eyes like brilliants, and for the first time he noticed her dimples. What a delightful sight! His heart leapt; her glee was contagious. “One day,” he thought, “you will drive a man out of his sanity.”

Later that night...

Ben was leaving Mitaka’s room, and he was on the way to his own, when he saw Rey on the hall. It was late again, she was standing there, just looking at the family portrait; too concentrated to notice his presence.  
“I still got those ears you know…,” he said jokingly, observing her with interest.  
“What?” She jolted when he spoke.  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to spook you.”  
She blushed as if he had caught her doing something forbidden.  
“What do you see there, Rey?” He inquired.  
His eyes were so deep, she was afraid he could read her openly like one of his books.  
“Love,” she said plainly turning back to the picture.  
“I still remember her voice... my mother’s, like she was talking to me, even scolding,” Ben confessed.  
She smiled still looking at the wall. “I wish I could remember my mother’s voice,” she whispered softly.  
Ben knew she was hurting. He moved a little closer and saw a random tear rolling down her cheek; lifting his hand, he gently brushed over her face...she was so delicate.  
“You are not alone…Rey,” his voice trembled as he spoke those words.  
She gazed back at him and replied “Neither are you.”   
Their eyes locked firmly with one another for a few more seconds, and then they walked apart in opposite directions as the silence seemed unbearable.

She closed the door behind her and exhaled loudly. One hand tracing the path were his fingers had touch her just minutes before, the other went straight to her chest; she pressed down vigorously afraid her heart might burst.

He closed the door and went straight to the wooden trunk. Breaking the lock with his foot and opening it like his life depended on it; as if it was the answer to all his burning questions.  
He took the object from inside and held it within both hands.  
“Why?” He asked the item in question.  
“Help me, please!” He fell to his knees as though in prayer. “I feel the pulling force of the light. Yet, you know I can’t be seduced, for I am doomed; just as you were. I will destroy everything that comes closer; my darkness is consuming. I can’t love anyone and nobody shall ever love me.”   
“Silence, just this denounced silence!” He didn’t receive any response, so he returned the object to its place and sat on the floor near it; another sleepless night ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my beta Alexandra, she adds beauty to this story and thanks to my cats, they inspire me. Do you have any questions, just let me know, fun its on the way!


	5. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More tension buildup between our favorite couple and what’s on the wood trunk? Yeah, we’re getting slowly there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, I was on vacation but as I promised, this won’t be abandoned or left inconclusive.

CHAPTER FIVE 

 

 

“Do you really think it is a good idea to just show up at Ben Solo's home?” Barbara enquired with a worrisome gesture while boarding her carriage.  
“Yes dear, it is a good idea. Stop spinning your head and get on,” responded her mother.  
“He is not the the type of a man who likes being abroad on the street or visit at home. He is rather the solitary kind mother. I don’t want to intrude.”  
“I don’t know why you are making such a fuss. He is expecting us, Barbara, we promised to help with the preparations and that’s exactly what we are going to do,” she said exasperated.  
“Bernadette Astor,” her daughter said with a serious tone, “I know what you’re trying to do, and I warn you! He is not my type, he’s much older than me.”  
“Older men are better Barbara. They are generous and more experienced. My second husband was a little older, yet he was kind,” she said freshly.  
“He was older than your father, mother... just disgusting,” said the daughter with a churning face.  
“But Ben Solo couldn’t be your father, so stop winning.”   
“Oh no, mother, you won’t sell me to the highest bidder! I am not going to be auctioned off and forced into a marriage! You can’t make me,” Barbara said pouting and crossing her arms.  
“Do you want to be alone for the rest of your life? I’m warning you, that pretty face is not lasting, and you will regret this when no man is giving you as much as a glance. Is that what you want?”  
“Rather!” she said decidedly. “I want to be loved, I want an actual relationship, I want to be happy, I don’t want to be with someone for the comfort of money while I rot inside with bitterness and frustration...I...I DON'T WANT TO BE YOU.”  
Bernadette sent her a facepalm reminder that she was still entitled to chastise her for raising her voice and being a brat.  
“You are just an ungrateful cretin, a foolish child with nothing but altruistic dreams. You ignoramus just remind me more and more of your father. He was an imbecile!”  
“Leave him alone, he is dead.” And then she broke into tears but didn’t speak another word, nor did her mother.

After that colossal fight all that followed was a sepulchral silence until their arrival at Ben’s mansion. The mother sprinted out of the carriage like nothing has happened, helped by Poe who also noticed the dejected face of the younger lady who remained inside and didn’t seem as eager to step off.  
“My lady,” he ask. “Is everything alright?” Then he gave her a tender smile and extended his hand.  
She nodded and reluctantly accepted his hand to step down.  
“Beautiful ladies should smile,” he said. “Mostly on days like this one,” he pointed out, “when the sky is gloomy and the storm is looming.”  
His words gave her some comfort and some color returned to her face. She noticed the man had an agreeable face and a kind heart.  
“I’m…I just need fresh air,” she said more to herself.  
“Maybe you could go for a ride; it is relaxing you know?”  
“Maybe” was all she could utter.

Esther ran into the kitchen annoyingly saying that the widow Astor and her daughter had arrived and were going to join Lord Ben for breakfast.  
Olaf, who was sitting and mauling over a bone, stood up quite fast.  
“Where are you going?” Esther asked him.  
“To see if they need something…” he explained weakly.  
“And… what would they need from someone like you?”  
He was about to open his mouth when she took him by one of his ears.  
“Listen, you little weasel! That floozie didn’t come, so if you were hoping to see her display of skin, you’re out of luck!”  
Rey and Maz looked puzzled but laughed at the scene of the couple.  
“Yesterday,” she said to them, “when we were coming back from the market, those two ladies were accompanied by Miss Eugene. She has a reputation of being a little tramp, it was obvious she put her eyes...and more on the Lord.”  
“Oh?” They said in unison.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

“I see you have hired more help around here,” Bernadette remarked while scanning Esther, (who was serving their food), frivolously.  
“Yes my lady, it was a thought search, but I’m glad we found the appropriate people,” Ben replied smiling at Esther.  
“However,” she added as Esther took her leave, “you should have asked me, I could have sent you some of my own, rather than having you picking up thieves from the market,” she said sarcastically.  
“I believe in second chances, and I wouldn’t want to take your staff. You need them as much as I do,” he replied not wanting to stretch an argument.  
“I’m glad you hired them, Lord Ben.” (Barbara broke her silence) “If they stole food that means they were just hungry, and hunger is a human’s basic instinct. Besides, they look clean today…”  
“Yeah,” agreed Mitaka, “it was a question of soap and water, as my Lord put it.”

……………………………………………………………………………………………..  
Organizing a party was a little more complicated than he ever thought it could be. It took hours of planning, and there was a never ending list of details to be arranged.   
“I insist,” Bernadette loudly intoned, “that we have life music for this event…”  
“Mother, it is of too short notice. Any high profile trio or quartet would need at least three months of advanced cognizance for that.”  
“So what, no music?”  
“There’s a piano in the studio,” Rey interrupted them shyly.  
Mother looked with disdain; daughter with interest.  
“What’s your idea? You have something in mind?” Asked Barbara.  
Bernadette rolled her eyes.  
“I know… I know someone who can play the piano and has a small group of musicians… friends. They are good, I heard them a few times.”  
“Genius! I love that idea,” Barbara said with enthusiasm.  
“I don’t think hiring a bunch of whippersnappers is a good idea.”  
“Mother, unless you can recreate a group of musicians we have found the best solution.”  
“Can you contact this friend of yours?”  
“Yes, I think so, I just need to ask Poe to let him know.”  
“Great, we’d like to do that right away,” and then she jumped to her feet and took Rey from her arm like she would do with a friend. The girls walked out all smiles and encountered Ben at the door.  
“Where are you ladies going?” He asked pleased to see them arm in arm.  
“That’s ladies’ business.” “By the way, this girl here,” Barbara pointed at Rey, “she is a keeper.”  
“I know,” Ben smiled and looked at Rey who was red like a tomato.  
Passing the girls he found a very depressed Bernadette sitting on the couch.  
“I am beginning to think that this was all a bad idea, Ben.”  
“I am beginning to think all the contrary, my lady,” he said contentedly.  
She took another sip of her liquor and served herself another straight shot.   
“You wouldn’t understand the implications,” she said before drinking the bitter liquid without a flinch.

The afternoon grew dark and the ladies returned to their home. The storm was approaching again; the house lay quiet.  
Rey delivered dinner to her father. Another day that he couldn’t get up from his bed. She also served tea to Ben who was reading in his studio; too sunken within some lecture to even lift his head as she came and went.  
The kitchen was clean thanks to Esther’s efficiency. It was a blessing she had come, so Rey had some spare time. Her last task was to pick up dirty laundry from upstairs. She politely took a basket from Mitaka’s room. He was a well mannered and clean man. His room rarely required any tidying up.  
She then stopped by Ben’s room and knocked on the door although she knew he wasn’t there.  
His room was somewhat organized, not as his friend’s, but he definitely took some pride and wasn’t a slob. Everything there smelled like him; a peculiar mix of sandalwood and ocean. She observed all the details. His bed was made and books were scattered around it. Some of his bags were still unpacked, but his clothes were folded and put away. She spotted his laundry basket, but deviated on the way, meeting his wooden box. To her amazement, the lock had been broken and curiosity arose from within. Here and now, she thought, she had a chance to uncover a mystery. Whatever was inside would tell her a great deal about the master and help her understand him. Oh, how much she longed to understand his doings, to know him underneath and to delve into his troubled mind.   
She approached the trunk slowly and carefully, put her hands on its sides. Her heart was pounding in her throat and sweat ran across her forehead. Deep inside she knew it was a violation, she was crossing a line and she could get in trouble for her trespasses. Yet, she lifted the lid, and her heart stopped.  
There, in full display, was a human skull. She screamed in horror at the sight of it and ran towards the door like she was chased by the devil; crashing against something strong and menacing. His figure was looming over her, and his eyes were like fire. He held her by the arms, and she was paralyzed, in shock!  
“Rey!” he shouted. “What did you see?”  
She kept her eyes closed and prayed that she wouldn’t die right there and then.  
“Rey!” he shouted again, “look at me!”  
She heard some voices in the background as she gave up, fainting helplessly. The last thing she felt was someone holding her fragile body, but she couldn't care any further.  
When she regained consciousness, she was lying in a bed. Her arms felt heavy, and her legs weak.  
“Where am I?”  
She could not recognize the place at first.  
“You’re my guest,” he said from across the room, sitting on a chair and wearing a very concerned face; his hands on his chin, his elbows on his knees.  
“Where is everyone?” Her panic was evident, she scrolled around with big eyes.  
“Trying to get a doctor and preparing some tea” he explained.  
“Tell me what you saw?” He asked, getting to his feet and coming closer to the bed.  
The terror came crawling back to her face, and she closed her eyes. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.  
He sat next to the bed.  
“Don’t be afraid,” he said. His voice was low, like a whisper.  
She trembled and although all her senses advised her to run, she couldn’t even move a finger. She was at his mercy now.  
“You saw the skull?”   
She nodded.   
“I didn’t mean to pry,” her voice was breaking. “I just got curious about the lock. Forgive me...my Lord.” She covered her face with her hands.  
“Rey…”  
“I wouldn’t tell anyone, just…please!” Her eyes more pleading than her voice, and he understood what her fears were.  
“You’re afraid of me…” he frowned. “You think I will hurt you, because you saw what I keep in my trunk?”  
More tears came.  
“You think I’m a monster, you have that look in your eyes, you’re terrified.”  
“How… how did it die?” She managed to ask, eager for his answer.  
“He… He was sick.”  
“He? You knew him?”  
“No, he died before I was born.” His eyes looked away.  
Now she felt relieved.  
“You…”her eyes searched his, “you’re afraid too…”  
He backed up and stood, disconcerted. The door opened, and Esther entered with a cup of tea and some alcohol.  
“Thank goodness, you’re awake!”  
“Esther, bring Rey’s night garments and help her…she will spend the night here.”  
“No!” She tried to get up, but her limbs still wouldn’t badger.  
“She is in no condition to leave this room on her own,” he completed the sentence.   
“Unless she wants me to carry her over to her alcove, that is.”  
Her mouth dropped but words didn’t escape.  
“I’m going to the master’s room,” he said taking his pajamas and a couple of books. He also took the wooden trunk.

He walked into their room. The memories chasing him; some were good and others not so much. He sat on the bed, placed the trunk on the nightstand and opened a drawer to keep his watch. He noticed a stash of letters. They were correspondence between his father and a Dr. Max. After reading a few of them, his heart raced as it became clear to him.  
On the morning before his parents fatal accident, his father told him they would be gone for a few days. Little Ben was upset because they weren’t taking him, but his father explained that home was the safest place, and that they would bring back a doctor to help his ailment.   
He saw them drive off, it was raining. His mother smiled and waved from the car. It was the last time he saw them alive. They never returned, and it was all his fault. If he wasn’t a cursed child, they wouldn’t have gone in the first place. Ben Solo, however, had suppressed that part of his life for his own protection. In his adult life he had turned to parties, women and a superfluous lifestyle. All until he suffered “that” episode; until his illness came back full power and reminded him that he wasn’t like the others. He wasn’t free. He was living on borrowed time, and death could knock on his door at will.   
It was also revealed that he was a lonely man, that he could not trust many people and that most, if not all the women in his circle, would run if they knew his secret. So he fled to the only place he knew was safe. He retrieved from the social life, because he had decided to embrace his fate. He had nothing to lose or to hold him back. He had been dead for years in and out; felt nothing for a long time and he just needed the tranquility which only this place could provide.  
Now, his imminent dismissal was not the relief he was seeking. She was right, he was afraid too. Terrified of all the feelings that had awakened in him since his arrival. Life could be macabre and ironic at times. For now that he was starting to feel alive like never before, now that his heart had started to beat and not just to pump blood...right now he was about to lose it all! The thought of being parted with Rey, of not seeing those precious eyes, was a price to high for him to pay. He had held her in his arms, felt her warm body as he carried her to his bed and he had, to his own embarrassment, imagining her naked and wantonly embracing him back. His mind was playing tricks on him, and some part of his anatomy had joined the party, so he had opted for a long cold shower. The storm that had ceased outside, however, had just begun to reverberate within his lifeblood...wreaking havoc inside his essence.

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my Beta and friend Alexandra.


End file.
